How to count to five.

I had to teach a customer how to count to five today. Seriously. They had two orders and the first one had 4 drinks and the second had one. I handed them one carrying tray that had five drinks on it and their food. I go on to the next order and they are still sitting at the window. They tell me I owe them another drink. I asked them how many combos they ordered. They said five. I said there are five drinks on that tray. They look at me funny like they don't comprehend what I am saying to them. I ask for the tray and count them out for them. They are STILL confused. I repeat it again.... and point at the drink and say one, two, three, four, five drinks.... you have five drinks. Again they don't get it. I repeated it again once more and still.... blank expression. They finally left and you could tell they thought I was lying to them and they DIDN'T have five drinks on the f*cking tray. This person was not f*cking with me - he genuinely looked confused.

I didn't ask to be the boss.

I hate my job. I am the boss now and I hate it. No wonder my last two General Managers quit. My job makes me want to kill myself on a daily basis. I also did not get the choice of opting out of being the boss. When you are second in command and the first boss quits.... guess what - YOU'RE IT! I am thankfully getting a replacement but not soon enough for my liking. 41 days and counting. Until then I get to wake up every Monday morning at 4 a.m. to do weekly inventory. 41 days of explaining to the big boss why my inventory counts suck. Also getting to hear from him why a 7% increase in sales isn't good enough. 41 days where I might just try to fire every idiot in the store... but then there would be no one left... well... a few left... I work in an store where one person goes around saying "I used to be a school teacher and I always wondered where all the idiots who fooled around and hid at the back of the class ended up." Well why don't you go look in the mirror dumb ass. Apparently there are ranks within the ranking of below average intelligence so they can feel superior over the "stupidest" person. Well I didn't walk into traffic today like Bob over there - so I am smarter - I just hit myself with a cupboard door.

These things happen

Why is it that I only have life altering moments or come to certain realizations when I'm drunk? I'm thinking that it is a problem when my therapist is a two six of vodka. It certainly helped me get over the guy I've fooled myself into believing I was in love with and realized,when I was completely drunk, that there is no possible way he will ever feel the same way about me. I also realized I can't pretend to be something I am not to get what I want. I've never acted like myself around him... or people in general. People tend to think I'm weird. I ended up smoking on a doorstep with some random stranger I did not know but he ended up being something like a mirror to me. He had the same type of childhood I did which is a rarity in itself. Seriously how many ex- Jehovah's witnesses who grew up with crazy parents and as white trailer trash are running around Alberta... even Canada? Other than my sisters he is the first. It was group drunken therapy... but it worked. It's not worth it to be fake... it takes too much energy and too much therapy. Especially when you realize there is nothing you can possibly do to get what you want. I just need to give it up and let go of everything that makes me unhappy and I won't need that therapy anymore. Or an intervention for alcohol abuse.